Cheshire Cat Grin

It has been a bit of a learning experience for myself as well as the students.  Mainly because it was my first time teaching chemistry and also for most of the students they were undertaking their first university learning experiences.

This created a few hurdles – namely the issue of spoon-feeding.  I hate spoon-feeding, it achieves nothing but temporarily learning topics the majority of the time and doesn’t encourage independent learning.  There are a lot of good students in this class, but there are also a lot of ‘dependent’ students and also lazy ‘dependent’ students.  The tutorial classes I would prefer to be smaller, but due to resources they can’t be.  I’m still trying to think how I could make the classes more interactive in a larger class but just went with the status quo this semester until I had figured the course out.

I was again horrified last week when going through a module on organic chemistry and was asked “Will the functional group diagrams be given in the exam?”  WTF?!?!  “No you have to know them, which is why I’m going through these questions.  Only formulae and data needed for calculation type problems will be given”. Then there was an uncomfortable silence on the students’ part – I had been saying for the last three weeks that these needed to be learnt but it still had not gotten through to some of them.

I’m not up the front rambling about them so that you can just listen to my dulcet tones, you actually have to know this stuff.  I would actually prefer if the students did more talking than I did, but need a better teaching room to allow for group work and in this class I suspect the talk wouldn’t be about chemistry any way P.

I’m glad the student did ask actually, because some others who probably wouldn’t have spoken up were probably under the same misassumption (if there is such a word, probably not).  They can have a gold star for adhering to the old adage “The only dumb question is the one that isn’t asked”.

Things I know:

*  Some students can really surprise you, for better or for worse.

*  The chemical structure of a carboxylic acid functional group – HA!, take that chemistry.

*  I finally can remember what a chiral carbon is.

Today is a miserable day weatherwise, although I am thankful for it as we exist on tank water alone, no reticulated chemicalised town water for us no sirree!   I was debating the merits of going out in the mud and dancing around for a while but unfortunately I have yet to acquire a pair of gumboots – and I am sure I meant to get some last winter as well, but forgot, as usual…

Storms in Paradise - actually taken during a summer storm but today looks very similar

I’m in a relatively perky mood despite the miserable weather, so maybe that winter blues thing isn’t working on me just yet.  Little monster has gone on a mini solid food strike so I am back to making a stream of formula bottles through out the day – if he was full of drool I would suspect extra teeth, but his little chinny chin chin is relatively tidy, so at the moment I am testing a few hypotheses about what he will eat (i.e. jamming food in his mouth where possible) – although I am kind of tired of getting carrots and pasta and various other sundry food items being thrown on the floor…

Things I know:

*  Do NOT get new carpet until your child is fully grown - i.e. at least 30 if they are female or 40 if they are male.  You will avoid mashed pea stains.  Luckily our carpet is relatively ancient and can withstand onslaughts.

*  A child WILL find these things far more interesting than their own toys: the tv remote, the zipper on a bag, a stray belt and the FOXTEL box.

*  There is no smell quite like wet dog…..thankfully 

*  Motherhood provides a wealth of research ideas – I’m getting back into thinking about research properly again – yay!

Of course I got older and realised that wasn’t true…or I ended up working in an area where I can revel in my ‘insufferableness’.

Knowing everything all the time can get a bit overwhelming so lately I have not been as rigorous as I normally am when doing things.  Lately this has manifested itself as students sometimes correcting me during tutorials while we are solving calculation type problems. 

Now rather than getting embarrassed or annoyed I am actually really proud of them, because it shows they are actually following what is going on, understand what is going on and know how to recognise mistakes.  Lately when looking for more full-time work I have put my two main goals for teaching tertiary students as training them to have the following abilities:

• The ability to think analytically and independently about technical problems.
• The ability to develop independent investigations into the effects of process or material modification on product or process behaviour

This makes sense in my areas of chemical/process engineering but now I am in effect teaching fundamental chemistry, which is a slightly different ballgame but has some commonalities.  Those specifically are the abilities to be analytical and independent, which is of course what most university educators hope their students can become by the time they graduate.

My new gig is a real eye-opener – in my previous teaching escapades I have encountered most students in the middle or the end of their degree.  My current position entails teaching students right at the beginning of the tertiary journey and from many different backgrounds and I must say I really wish I was a better teacher.  

A lot of the students are sort of in the position of making the transition from high school to uni or from life to uni (mature students) so in essence some need handholding while some are pros and can do it on their own.  I know there is a reason why it really needs to be the GREAT lecturers teaching first year classes and I hope to one day be one of those – when I grow up! 

Things I know today:

*  I am insufferable

*  I am also a Know-It-All

*  I am a Know-It-All who doesn’t know enough

*  The fact that I know that I don’t know enough is cause for celebration as I can always learn and therefore know more in time (WTF?!)

So I remembered the importance of keeping in touch as I have lately been getting regular emails from a dear old friend of mine from back in the undergrad days.  She recently had a change of job and is in the throes of learning the ropes as well as catching up with a myriad of friends from those good old days.

I was rather envious and made a pact with myself to really keep in touch with people – not just through random Facebook updates but really make an effort.  I promise myself this every year as a New Year resolution, but now I should make it an every day resolution I think, because I do tend to forget a lot of things…as my hubby reminds me .

Now let’s move on to something I know – because of course ‘I Know Everything’.   I might make this a feature of post – ‘Things I know’.

I know:

*  That I can be a social retard

*  Physics, Chemistry, Maths (I hate Biology hence it’s absence)

*  That everyone has a book inside them and lately mine has been straining to get out.

*  That I will buy a 2L tub of ice-cream – eat 3 scoops and then leave it for 8 months taking up space in the freezer.

Random facts – brought to you by my stream of consciousness – which has  a serious load of flotsam contained within it…

Yes I have a Facebook page (like a lot of people) and on there I made some stupid comment about ‘I’m researching a cure for insomnia www.worldsmostboringblog.com’ (by world’s most boring – I meant here).  Unfortunately an old friend took it seriously and I felt absolutely terrible.  Despite not legitimately being an insomnia researcher, I still (being the person that I am) did some due diligence and tried to find people at my institution that really work in that kind of arena.  I really hope that I have not offended my old school friend….

Moral of the story – stop trying to be funny………..no really, stop it.

It’s the equivalent of your granny going out in a miniskirt and tube top.  The university has a rich history of education and research, but lately it seems to overcater to the new generation of ipod loving, 80s knock-off wearing hip kids and I for one am apalled, APALLED I tell you.  I sound like I am twice my age!!

Maybe if I had actually gone to the marketing meetings where they had put forward their new ideas I could have told them it was ugly….

So what is this exactly. Well out in the blogosphere a very good idea was proposed to celebrate Ada Lovelace day. If you’re not sure who Ada Lovelace is, go here.  She was basically the original IT chick, to put it in colloquial terms, pretty much a mathematical genius at a time when women were still meant to be ‘decorations’ in society.  Girl power .

Anyway, so who am I blogging about in honour of this day?  I thought long and hard as I was going to pick someone well known or who had done something world-changing.  However I am going to honour someone who is well known in her field but may or may not be world famous.  Someone who helped change my world.

She is one of the first female lecturers I encountered during my undergraduate degree in chemical and materials engineering, she is Associate Professor Margaret Hyland.  When I started doing my undergraduate degree, she was the only female lecturer in the Department of Chemical and Materials Engineering at The University of Queensland.

She specialised in a lot of aluminium research at the time (doing a lot of work with Comalco), but with many other research interests in materials engineering – in fact if you look at her page you will see that there is a lot more to her than I am writing about here.

I will never forget the first time our class encountered her – here was this small of stature woman with the soft Canadian accent, working in a traditionally male-dominated field, lecturing us on engineering materials (or it may have been thermodynamics). She knew her stuff and she knew how to get respect, without being an ‘aggressive’ personality.

I mostly remember for her enthusiasm in spectroscopy and microscopy techniques (particularly electron microscopy which I now love to do as well!).  I also remember that while being an academic she was also mother to two young children at the time and how she balanced that and still managed to do as much research and teaching as she did/does I will never know.

So here’s to you Dr Hyland, you inspired me to be where I am today.  I’m not sure you want that claim to fame , but to me you are the most inspiring woman in technology/science.

Yes I do know what it’s like – I even took the short quiz which helps you figure out whether you suffer from impostor syndrome or not which can be found here.  I answered ‘yes’ to every single question!!!  The very fact that I work comfortably as an academic in the field of science, yet don’t consider myself capable of continuing to do so or to be high-achieving enough is a prime example of one of the symptoms of impostor syndrome.

Many different types of people can suffer from this syndrome including those in high profile jobs such as doctors and lawyers.  Many feel a loss of confidence and some self-doubt sometimes but letting it get to you can be very debilitating.  Sometimes I’ve even gone so far as to question whether I should be working in an area which is less challenging to the brain and then I remember that I WANT to be challenged – I don’t want to waste away doing something which bores me.

I don’t have a arty creative bone in my body and I love science so I know I am where I’m meant to be but sometimes others can get to you when they denigrate the path you are taking.  I chose to ‘slow down’ a little bit recently – I could have pushed to get a grant application out or apply to a postdoc or lecturing position somewhere else.  But a couple of things changed my mind, mostly this little guy:

Little munchkin

I slowed down a bit for the benefit of this little guy, although I have a very supportive stay-at-home husband, I wanted to be an actively involved mummy.  Being a full-time academic is very time-intensive particularly in the early days when you are trying to get established and I didn’t want to be doing that while Cas is so young.

Maybe I’ll change my mind when he hits his terrible twos …

This is the first week I have taught into a university chemistry course – EVER! Luckily it is an introductory course – what some universities would call a ‘bridging’ course, designed to bring students up to speed who may not have studied chemistry in high school, but will need it for further tertiary study.

The class is large (compared to my other classes which verge on 15-30) and there is such a variety of students – young, old, some with a little background in the subject, some with none but who are able to apply themselves well and understand it.  The level of chemistry covered is high school chemistry – the difference between these students and a lot of high school students is that they really want to learn.

This is when I had my ‘Eureka’ moment – I wouldn’t mind teaching high school level courses, but I’m not that fond of younger teens.  In teaching bridging courses I can have the dedicated students but still teach fundamentals.  So I learnt that there is also a maths course – I wouldn’t mind helping out there as well.

The reason being I often end up with students who are 2nd or 3rd year university students who have forgotten or didn’t know their fundamentals – particularly in maths, but things like chemistry and biology are also lumped under that.  When learning about the sciences it is necessary to have a solid grounding in some or all of these basics and that is not there with some students.

I think sometimes it starts with the beginning when basic concepts are first being taught – so high school or even primary school in some cases (!) is where it should have started.  I did have some interesting conversations where students mentioned that they just didn’t pay attention at school and never thought it would apply.  Now they would like to study for a particular job – which requires chemistry and now their interest has peaked – they just needed longer to develop it.

I was lucky in that I love science – I had no idea what I would do after high school – just vaguely something scientific. ….and that is exactly what I do!

First task……approach bridging maths lecturer – this could be the start of something good for me – where I can use my skills to help others.

It takes me even longer to get what I would like done when I have to waste time talking to the Autobot – although wouldn’t that be awesome! “Welcome to XYZ power, Optimus Prime here, how may I help you today”. “Well Optimus how about you shutdown the robot answering service and sort out my problem” “Affirmative” “Sweet!”.

Ok enough silliness. The other day I had to ring one of our utility companies to complain about our bill – I was sent around in 3 circles through the robot system “Welcome…Push 3″ “Push 2″ “Enter your account code” “Bring Bring” “Welcome…Push 3…” – aargh!!! Then I had to spend about an hour and a half with someone who just did not ‘get it’ with regards to the problem I had. Luckily they didn’t just forward me on to another person who would just hang up the line.

I really hate when things don’t go according to the usual routine and I have to pick up the phone. Which is why I was quite pleased to find some places refuse to have an ‘Autobot’. Now if only I knew what they were……